8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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