No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
