Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
