maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
