i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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