I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
