dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
