i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
you told grandpa to call you daddy
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
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