Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
