Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
