At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
