Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
