During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
