Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
