So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
