piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
nutella sex= disaster
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Tornado booty call.. dedication
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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