You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
