you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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