All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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