I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
