What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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