Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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