It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
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