You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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