He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
