Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
