You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
should my penis look like a turkey
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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