This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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