Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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