my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
