What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Randomize
