Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
