yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
