and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
