she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
