Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
