we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
