So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
