I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
