Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
