i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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