i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
