i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
