'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
this hospital has no fireball
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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