If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
