things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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