Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
do nipples grow back?
Randomize