Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I would fuck him just for his dog
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize