Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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