My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
